Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Competition Arises...

I'd like to thank everyone who applied for the position of "Kellan's Keeper," there was quite a strong response. All applications were thoroughly read, studied, and smelled, as I wanted to be sure no one was overlooked in this search. At this time I must ask that no more submissions be made, as the position has been filled, and is being filled quite capably. In fact, the decision was made in the last few months to make this position permanent. The woman of my dreams, and newly minted "Keeper of Kellan, " (aka my caretaker) is this lovely lady, Christen Gee.

As previously stated, her position as Keeper is becoming permanent. Christen took such a liking to the occupation that she asked me to marry her, and after much weeping and squealing I obligingly said yes. (I'm still waiting for my ring...)

Christen has done so well that her amazing talents have caught the eye of another man. How typical, as soon as I find someone who is a perfect fit a competitor comes along to steal her away. Who is trying to steal her away? I'll show you.

My nephew is quite the handsome devil, it's true. He may seem cute and innocent, but this little tycoon is not to be taken lightly. Known in professional spheres as James Reece, he is a shrewd business man, throwing you off your guard with his little bow tie and plushy seat.

Little James is not one to limit himself to the sophisticated lifestyle. No, he's got cred in the Mexican rap scene, where he's known as "Santiago, the rapper of love." Only among close friends is he known as "Li'l Santi."

He's thug.

As you can probably guess, once I found out that James was interested in Christen I had to move fast. He is able to hypnotize her with his charming little smile, and she just melts when he giggles at her. After some intense negotiations we were finally able to come to an agreement, as evidenced by our handshake.

Christen and I will stay together, while James is allowed to tag along. Still, I have to wonder if he's not too pleased with the way things played out. He's one little guy that I'll have to watch out for...