Friday, August 27, 2010

"Ya know who you look like?"

It's a question I've heard since I was a twelve. I don't like making people feel stupid (well, at least not all the time), so I'll politely smile and allow them to continue.

"You look like ___ (Insert: Matthew Broderick, Inspector Gadget, Ferris Bueller, Sarah Jessica Parker's husband)."

I hear that quite often, at one time it was several times per week, and in one day it happened 3 times. There are no complaints about the comparison, he looks young, and if I had an acting career it probably would have tanked just as badly.

My only hope is that I can marry someone who doesn't look so frightening.

There have been times when I've been concerned about how I look, which is a natural thing for just about everyone. We all have little things that we wish we could change, but eventually we all need to come to terms with how we look (people who get cosmetic surgery just because they aren't happy with some feature of their body are just lazy and have some deep deep issues).

My glory days of good looks were from birth until I was 7. Ask anyone in my family, I was one good lookin' little shiz. The awkward stage was ushered in by my strange desire to grow out my hair. Not all over. Just in the back.

That's right, I desired to grow a mullet. At age 7. Without any encouragement from external sources, and without knowing what exactly it was. I'm fairly sure I prematurely ushered in the ugly duckling stage of my life.

Personally, I feel that the curtain finally closed on that long stage of life in the last few years. However, even though it lasted for a while, it wasn't a Greek tragedy. It was more of a comedy actually.

Through junior high and high school I developed a mantra I'd tell myself:

"You won't get anyone with your looks, so you better work on that personality!"

Don't go thinking, "oh that's so sad you had to think that." There was no depression or self loathing. It was just a matter of fact. There were bajillions of better looking people than me, but I noticed a trend. A lot of the "good looking" people were dumb as a post, or just plain jerks. All they had to offer was something to look at. And let's face it, everyone gets to a point where no one wants to look at them.

So, I figured I'd become the person that actually has something to offer, beyond being a piece of eye candy. I learn about people, what they like and dislike, what their goals are, who and what they want to become. It's amazing the amount of trust you gain from people when they learn you're not just there for action.

This can be a boon and bust when it happens with a girl I might consider pursuing. Sometimes you learn things that let you know it's best to move on, and you pray for whomever that girl ends up marrying. Other times the relationship gets too friendly, so the girl doesn't want that to progress to anything else.

There are pros and cons, but that goes without saying for just about everything in life.

With my mantra in mind, I feel that I've become a pretty good people person, able to relate with, or at least communicate amicably, with just about everyone. And even though I'm still not the best looking guy in a crowd, I'm not too worried for my future.

At least as long as I don't marry someone scary like Sarah Jessica Parker. Ooh, I just got the chills.

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